Why is it that the friends you consistently are willing to listen to when they are having a bad day and need to vent the least likely to return the favor?  Just an observation on the nature of human interaction.

These are in no particular order:

1) Star Trek: Next Generation, season 7.

2) Pushing Daisies, starting with season 1.

3) Entourage, starting with season 1.

4) Mad Men, starting with season 1.

5) Six Feet Under, starting with season 1.

6) Dead Like Me, starting with season 1.

7) X-Files, starting with season 1.

NCIS, starting with season 1.

9) Boston Legal, starting with season 1.

0) Whatever the cable networks are running in marathon mode?

So reply in the comments or via twitter…. if you care.

Part 2 of the series of things I’ve learned in 2009. Some are amusing, some are enlightening and many are both.

#2: You can’t make people behave in ways which go against their own self-awareness and mental configuration.  People do the things they do because of how they are wired, how they were raised, what motivations they come to possess as they mature and probably dozens of factors of which neither you nor they are aware.  It can be frustrating to see someone treating you badly, or dishonestly, but in reality, it’s usually easier just to let them do what they do and cope with it by figuring out ways to get what you need out of the relationship.  Sometimes the person doesn’t know that they are being what amounts to evil, and I’ve always wanted to believe that was the case the majority of the time.  Unfortunately, that isn’t the case.  The sad reality is that 90% of the time, those people who treat others in evil ways, are fully aware of what they’re doing, they just are incapable of recognizing that how they’re behaving is despicable.  Vile behavior is unavoidable.  If you accept that that is how many people are, life is more peaceful than if you try to fight it or re-shape them to meet your needs.

As 2009 comes to a close, I’ve learned a few things.  Some are amusing, some are enlightening, many are both!

#1:  When someone says something insensitive or ignorant, whether it is about you, or not… it’s always more effective to simply stare at them from across the conference room table with the slightest of smile and a twinkle in your eye.  Don’t say anything, just fix your gaze at them until they get so painfully uncomfortable that they won’t look at you for the remainder of the meeting.

Dear Constant Irritant:

I’d really enjoy it if you would stop being a whiny, sniveling irritant. You see, if you avoid this, then you have more time to accomplish your goals. When you are being whiny and snivelingly irritating, you’re being counterproductive when it comes to accomplishing your goals without needing others to back you up. I’m sure you can understand why I find that to be “constantly irritating,” my Constant Irritant.

For you see, I have my own goals to accomplish, and whenever I have to stop because you’re causing me irritation by worrying about things about which you shouldn’t have any concern, not only can’t I accomplish my goals, I lose time… of which I think you can agree, there is far too little as it is.

So, in closing, please stop being irritating. Life would be much simpler for us all, and you’d be a happier person if you just focused on your purpose and not on creating drama needlessly. (Of course I’d be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge that you might not even be aware that you’re creating needless drama, but I’m pretty sure you know exactly what you’re doing.)

I appreciate your attention.

–Marc

… I don’t want to hear anyone complain when my radio station starts playing non-stop Christmas music around Thanksgiving…. I don’t want to get the annual series of abusive emails from listeners…. because:

KROGER Supermarkets have already started playing Christmas music! Target has Halloween decorations up AND Christmas cards, decorations and more surrounding the Halloween area…. Oh.. and rumors have it that some Hallmark Stores have been playing Christmas music since July.

So, in November, when you think about emailing or calling your favorite radio station to abuse the DJ for doing his job and playing non-stop Christmas music, remember that WE don’t do this in September… or July… and remember that the person at the other end of the phone or email is a person.

I just spent a week doing live broadcasts from the Great Frederick Fair.  I had lots of fun people-watching throughout the week, enjoying fair food, trying to get my on-site producer to go get yardsticks for me, suffering the smell of chickens and wondering at the variety of things which could be deep-fried…. and here are some things I observed:

1) There are far too many people who are dentally challenged.  I think the worst was an entire family of people who had some sort of tooth issue.  Seriously… we’re talking mother, father, grandparents and 5 kids!  Some were missing many teeth… some just had unusually configured teeth.  Either way it was kinda scary.

2) There were far too many mullets for the year 2009.  Just sayin’. Including an entire family of mullets…(and not the same as the family mentioned above, although the mullets were well-represented there too.)

3) We had a great spot for our booths this year, along one of the main walking paths through the fairgrounds and we were surrounded by some really great local vendors.  The big drawback was being located across from the Rabbit and Poultry building.  On the couple of humid days we experienced, the smell was UNBEARABLE.

4) I think the food and the smell of the food was by far my favorite thing at the fair and the wonder and variety of fair food never ceases to amaze me.  I had so much good stuff, from hot dogs and cheeseburgers, to BBQ Pit Roast Beef, for lunch and dinner.  Plus french fries, onion rings, and the like… and that only touches the tip of the deep-fried iceberg…

5) …which may be the ONLY thing you can’t get deep-fried at the Great Frederick Fair… have you ever noticed the sheer number of deep-fried food items?  Funnel cakes, elephant ears, of course… those are the standards… but then there are Oreos, Twinkies, pickles… all of which I’ve known about… but the new one for me was the DEEP-FRIED CORN ON THE COB!  None of it is good for you, so it’s a good thing that calories don’t count for the Fair is like Christmas… it’s a holiday.

In case you didn’t make it out, here’s a little audio and picture of what you missed on Friday, which is traditionally “Kid’s Day” at the Great Frederick Fair:

All things considered, it is such a definitive part of life in Frederick County and while it was a week of hard work, that at times was painfully tedious, I look forward to next year!

…in the last couple of weeks.  I’ve  made a concerted effort to keep my living space clean, make my bed and generally maintain a neat living environment…. and I bought a nice bed/comforter set!

What have I become??

It seemed pretty reasonable when I was buying the stuff the other day.  But then to see it on the actually made bed… Too strange!

Well, at least my mother will be pleased, she’s been trying to get me to make my bed for almost 39 years!

(As a bonus, this picture includes Gizmo preparing to clean his personal area, whilst Frank observes, and presumably points out spots which need extra attention.)

I think the IDEA of New Year’s Resolutions is a great one. Most of the time these are motivated by the best of intentions… losing weight, eating healthier, traveling more, whatever… but most of us, myself included, tend to “forget” those resolutions before the calendar flips to February.  Since you probably shared those resolutions with your spouse, significant other, your mother and your friends, you know SOMEONE is going to razz you about your failure… I have the solution, one inspired by a post at Holidash*… make sure you include a disclaimer or qualifier so you can claim that you never made it a certainty that you would lose weight, or even take steps to do it… here’s an example:

I LOVE doughnuts… when someone brings in doughnuts, whether their those silly “donettes” you can buy in the grocery store or the ones that come from that big donut shop down the street… I… CAN’T… RESIST!  So suppose I want to make a resolution to curtail my doughnut intake in 2009, but I want to give myself an out when I eventually fail?   Here’s the solution…. instead of saying “I resolve to eat fewer donuts in 2009″ say something like “This is the year I’m going to think about eating fewer doughnuts!”  See…. the “This is the year” part completely distracts the “I’m going to think about” part… nice, right?  The key is to say it with some panache’ and enthusiasm! Or how about “I resolve to not eat any more donuts in 2009….*MUMBLE AS YOU WALK AWAY*”  The mumbled part can be “than I did in 2008″ or *this week” or “right now”  (that last one is handy if you’re caught with doughnut in hand…)

So there you have it.   I’m going to make a bold resolution for 2009:

I RESOLVE TO EAT MORE OR LESS DONUTS IN 2009 THAN I DID OR DID NOT EAT IN 2008!  (That about covers it… right?)

Happy Monday!

(NOTE: I originally published this on my page at KEY 103 …)

SlimFast “Optima” = Ass In A Can. I don’t think I can imagine a more foul-tasting substance! It is chalky, thick, chemical-tasting, overly sweet and has an awful aftertaste. The stuff is nasty! Everyone says “the colder it is, the better it tastes.” To which I want to respond “BULLSHIT! You tell yourself that to help force yourself to choke it down instead of having say, a slab of bacon fat with extra fat on top.” I couldn’t imagine it over ice… it would be like putting ice cubes in near-rancid milk and saying “mmmm a milkshake!” BLEAH!